Autumn Many Tears

[kimteresa]

My existing cocker hasn't been neutered yet because of a heart condition so it could be that.  Autumn doesn't like it when Jonesie gets any attention and will growl and has attacked him today.  Its such a shame because he shows me so much love.

[Cockertime Blues]

Oh dear.  Sometimes they take so long to settle.  He WILL get the right home though, just not yours, which is just one of those things.  The right dog will be waiting for you somewhere.  You just have to find each other.

[kimteresa]

Thank you, I am feeling so sad tonight to think it is his last with us.  Am I a terrible person.

[Koslg]

No. You've tried. At least neither is injured. Sounds like tomorrow evening you need spangle hugs and chocolate or something stronger xxxx

[AndyB]

 

No you are not a terrible person.  I have experienced this first hand.  I lost my cocker bitch, Molly four years ago and longed for a companion for Jazz.  After several months we heard of a male black cocker aged 20 months who needed to be rehomed.  He was the most beautiful dog and at first they appeared to get on.  We kept the dog for four days but it was obvious it was not going to work.  Jazz, my dog, was very jealous and there was lots of growling and snarling.  I had to try and keep them separate in the house and even on walks Jazz would sidle up and growl at the other dog.  It was very stressful and we knew it was not going to work.  I will never know if, had the other dog had been female, whether Jazz would have been more accepting, which may be the case with your situation, two male dogs.  I understand you must be feeling awful tonight, and tomorrow will be very upsetting, but Autumn has been through enough already.  He may have to be rehomed as an only, and very much loved doggy.  Sending 

[kimteresa]

Thank you AndyB you have really helped.

[Ben's mum]

You are not a terrible person, you have to go with your heart 

I knew there would be problems when I introduced another dog and it was a nightmare, Ben hated Harry on sight, he is not a sociable dog anyway, and they spent a lot of time separated by a baby gate. We had lots of growling and snarling and a lot of nasty spats and I spent the first few weeks wondering what I had done and feeling guilty for turning Bens world upside down, because I wanted a second dog. Harry was a rescue and had his own issues which didn't help. I had excellent advice from Top Barks and support from Col members and we got through it. There are ways to cope with two dogs who don't like each other much but from my experience it took weeks and weeks before things settled a bit. Then probably another year  before I relaxed and started to enjoy them both.

You have to go with what you feel is best for you and your family. We have no children to worry about when there was growling etc, so it made life easier and I guess I knew it would be difficult so it wasn't a complete shock., but I honestly don't know if I would go through it again, the first few months were more stressful than enjoyable.  If you feel Smithy has to go back then don't feel bad, as you have to do the best for you all, but if you do want to keep him there are ways, but it is a difficult road and takes a lot of time.

 

[pipkoi]

That is so sad, I really do feel for you all.

[kimteresa]

Stayed awake with Autumn all last night he lay on me and didn't move, such a loving dog.  I've now noticed its 50/50 between him and my other cocker so not all Autumn's fault, neither of them want to share me.  I hope Many Tears don't think too badly of me but I'm so scared one of them will end up injured.

[AndyB]

Aaaw bless you both.  I think Ben's Mom has also summed it up.  My OH didn't want me to have another dog and he thought I was not being fair on Jazz, who was perfectly happy as an only dog.  My OH said it is you who wants another dog Jazz is absolutely fine on his own and all this is upsetting him.  I now know he was right and I have had to accept that the next time I have another Cocker spaniel will be when I no longer have my beloved Jazz.  I had to make the decision fairly quickly because I think it would have caused problems between us if I had insisted on persevering.  I still look at the photos of the Black Cocker on my mobile occasionally and wonder where he is now.  So I do completely understand. 

[Mudmagnets]

Haven't read all the thread, but really sorry it did not work out for you. 

[Dinah]

Sorry it didn't work out.  I have a different set up to you as I foster dogs and my own are used to others coming here.  Autumn has been 'on his holidays' with you.  He's learnt what it's like to live in a house/see the tv etc.  He's also learnt that humans can be kind.  Don't beat yourself up about having to return him.  Am sure he'll soon find his forever home. x

[kimteresa]

He loved watching the television and I loved watching him watch the television.  Jonesie is so much happier now he has his mum to himself and for the first time in a week he has a smile back on his face and is eating his food again.

[ollie nathan's mum]

What a shame, poor Autumn, hope he gets his forever home, such a lovely boy xx

[sodpot2000]

You have nothing to feel bad about. You had the guts to step up and offer a home to a dog in need. In the event it wasn't going to work and you had the courage to put the dogs' needs above your own and to call a halt before any harm was done. MT will now have a better idea what sort of home will be best for Autumn and so should have more success next time.