Just wanted to chime in on this one.
Firstly, big hug.
I know exactly how you feel. Do all the research, be a responsible person, prepare, already had a dog, etc etc. Collect the pup and WHAM! What the hell?
?!!!!!!! Ours was all of those things (apart from the yipping but with the addition of some ferocious biting!)
I can only impart what we have found has helped:
1) Don't take it personally.
2)Learn to increase your sense of humour so you can look at your dog, roll your eyes and say 'you idiot'
3) Don't start shouting (yeah we did it) otherwise you're just all barking. Mine loved that-it made things even more exciting!
4)Be the bigger person. Decide what to do, and do it calmly and quietly. Think- it's just a little dog.
We found that when ours got ridiculous, the only thing that really worked was exclusion. Either calmly pick her up and place her out of the room for a minute, or if she was attacking us-like a demented Tasmanian devil-we would get up and leave the room ourselves. Sometimes 10 times in a night! And it has to be unmistakable exclusion for the crime. I.e: Do it immediately and comprehensively. If there are 2 people in the room, they both have to get up and go. No looking at her, touching, talking, just go.
Ours is now 16 months and still has some irritating behaviours but some good ones too. At about 6-12 months she got really cocky and thought she was going to start getting snappy with us but we put her in her place (a telling off then a longer exclusion) and touch wood she doesn't try that on any more. Occasionally we still have to wheel out the putting out of the room routine but generally she is much much much better. I think if you can develop a close bond that will really help. Which is hard. I know, but I really love my little dog now and I think she loves me too. It's almost as though everything they do is 100% over exuberant, even the bad stuff and they don't even know they're doing it. Sometimes if I have a bit of a go at my dog she looks at me like I've got 3 heads!
This breed in my limited, singular experience, does not fit with the description of the 'merry cocker, perfect family dog, biddable,wants to please, easy to train...' what?!!??!
There are still a few things I would like to iron out with mine but she is super affectionate, loyal, loves people, friendly with other dogs, and I honestly think she's going to be a cracking little dog long term. I have realised that I must stop comparing her to my previous dog. They are not the same so it's not fair.
I contained ours for a bit, but she is actually fine if you trust her and leave her in a dog proofed room when we go out. My husband and I have coined a new dog related phrase:
5)'One needs to learn to lower one's expectations'.
We find it helps! :005:I do feel for you and if you have a feisty, opinionated one like ours, there's probably a way to go before things get better but they will. Apparently cockers are puppies until they're 2, and 3 before they steady up at all. They are definitely an investment dog and not for the faint hearted. I'm tough as old boots and mine's had me in tears! Give yourself a break sometimes and good luck with her. It will get better.