I lost Marti aged 12 and a 22 yr old cat a year ago, and was sad but ok. , but losing my 8 yr old Bob has ripped me up. That was last July. I couldn't look at a cocker for months. Recently I have cuddled a roan and a golden , but black ones like him , just no. I'm leaky eyed even writing about it now. They become part of you , don't they.
I never thought it could be so bad, so like the others, I'm with you in the bad place, and I suppose we are all completely daft. I have a Rescue dog i have grown to love , as she has learnt to live with and love me. But nothing beats that cocker with his x- Ray eyes into my soul, and I am sure it is the same for you.
PatsyXx