i am so sorry to hear how your are feeling, from what you described, it comes across how much you loved your little ozzy,
I lost my little girl bracken a few weeks ago, and although in my heart I know I did the right thing, I feel so guilty , what if I had asked this, or should they have tried that, I think part of grieving is going through the what if's,
take comfort that you were there for him, and no matter how much you were hurting, you were there. he knew you were there, I'm sure, they sense it, he would have felt so comforted knowing you were with him.
Perhaps he has met up with my girl Bracken, and are running free
take care of yourself,
Maria