It has been 6 weeks since Josie went to the bridge. I can't believe how much I am still missing her - even though we still have 4 other dogs. The house seems so very quiet. I would never have said Josie was a noisy dog (that would be Poppy - aka Miss Yappy!) but she was such a huge character. Walks are very strange now - I always knew that if anything happened, Josie would protect me and the rest of the dogs. Suddenly, walking in the dark in the early mornings is a little more nerve wracking now she has gone. I am constantly hearing sounds in the trees and I get nervous - for 7 years I haven't had to worry because Josie was always there.
She would never let me have much of a lie in and as soon as I was up, she wanted to go out - straight away! Now, the others don't care if I have a cup of tea and a sit down before taking them out. Life is just so very different.
I have changed things around in the car because I kept expecting to see her smiling face in the rear view mirror so now the crate is in the back with Suki so I can see all the dogs in the mirror instead of just Suki, looking lonely.
This is the first weekend that Suki hasn't started crying at 6.00pm on the dot. She cried and whined until I fed her. This is something she started the day after Josie went to the bridge and it was not something she had ever done before. Just yesterday and today, she hasn't done it.
Dexter has taken over her role of carrying a ball on our walks - Josie always used to carry one in the hope that I would throw it, although since she became poorly, she couldn't chase it because it hurt her, so she just carried it. Now Dexter carries a tennis ball - it's as if he is doing it for Josie (or maybe that's just me putting my feelings onto him?) I am sure Suki misses her too and the others were subdued for a while, but seem back to normal now.
When we see a black dog - especially lab shaped - in the distance, they all look twice. I am not stupid enough to think that they think it could be Josie because obviously with their brilliant noses they will know it's not her, but I am sure they do a sort of double take just to make certain.
When Trev lost his leg, Josie was the one we worried about most. We were so sure she would knock him over. The day he came home from hospital - she was so incredibly gentle. She just knew. She sat beside him and rested her head on his leg, gazing at him adoringly as she had obviously missed him. As he grew stronger, she gradually became more like her usual boisterous self around him, but never once did she knock him over. She stole his stick once and it still has her tooth marks in it! Her second name was Doofus - because she just was such a DOOFUS!
She was just the happiest, waggiest, soppiest, clumsyist, most loving, daftest, special dog in the world and she will be missed forever. Hope she has joined up with Buffy and Harriet and they are all playing together free of pain and illness and waiting there with my parents until we meet again.
