Rescue dog with separation issues

[watson20]

Hi, I'm new to the site and new to owning a Cocker Spaniel.

I have had other dogs before (x breeds) and I have never had to deal with what I am at the moment.

We looked into which breed to get as we have 2 boys age 3 & 6 and a cat. I saw an ad for Beth and felt so sorry for her, she is partially blind and was being hit by the owners autisic son. When we went to look at her, she was in such a state that I couldn't leave her. I was told she could be left for at least 2 hours and mainly attaches to 1 person.

Well, I got her straight to the vets and had her injections done which she had not had any since her first, major underweight problem, and cannot be left more than a minute.

Her eye is now being treated but will be ongoing, put on a little weight and her coat is now shiny. The main problem is her attachment, she will cry if I pop out of the room, major barking and howling when being left at home on her own. My husband tries to play with her but will not have anything to do with him and refuses to walk but if I take the lead she will trot along nicely.

The main reason I'm on here is, to be perfectly honest, if I had been told that was the main reason they were getting rid of her then I wouldn't have taken her on. I consulted a trainer who has set out a plan but I know it will take time and I have a child myself with needs but I have no one near by who I can leave her with. I'm feeling restricted at the moment and we have both with a very sad heart even spoken of her being placed with someone with more time.

She starts to make progress then we have a major set back with crying while I'm in the same room. I don't know much of her history to even begin to understand why she is so bad. She is the most adorable dog and very calm but with her eye on me the whole time. I've tried all the calming aids but nothing makes a difference, I would love for her to feel settled without needing me at all times. My son would love to play with her but she is just not interested. Feeling very confused and don't know what else to do to try and make her feel safe. As I'm new to this breed, is there something I'm not understanding about Cocker Spaniels?

[maddycakes]

Poor little thing, sounds like she's had a tough start, not had any experience with separation issues but i'm sure someone will be along very soon, have you read through the topics on SA?

Cockers crave attention and sounds like she feels safe around you? Hope you get it sorted.

[watson20]

Yes I have and the trainer has given me a plan whereby you leave the room for a few seconds and gradually build up.

Just can't understand why she is so attached to me and why she is making some progress and then goes right back to square 1.

Thanks for your reply

[Goggins]

Im sorry to read that you are having s.a problems with Beth...

Sounds like she has had a really rough start to life...how old is she and how long have you had her for? This may be helpful info for others on here to help you out...

Fantastic you have already had a trainer come and see you all...

Sadly, Im useless at most behavioural stuff But I know there are some really lovely and informed folk on here who Im sure will pop along and help you out..

Sending you some kind  during this difficult period..

[Kaz]

Hi there, sorry to hear about the problems You are having. If you get stuck I'm happy to pass on details of a behaviourist. He's actually a neighbour of mine, but am no way forcing this upon anyone- just if you feel you need more advice. If you get stuck pm me. Good luck in the meantime

[minimoo]

how long have you had Beth, this isnt going to be  quick fix, but dont give up im sure she will be worth the effort in the end , is she crate trained , i had a dog that had terrible SA and i got a crate and trained him and it was his safe place , can you get your husband to feed her every day and maybe groom her for a few minutes every day she prob wont want to know at first but if he is patient im sure it would help , my dogs love my husband but they are def my dogs in the fact that they follow me everywhere including the loo and sit outside the shower doors when im in it , its just the way it is , im sure more people will be along with advice, stick around as this is a great site and you will get lots of support on here

[Saffaroo]

Hi there and welcome to COL      I'm so sorry about the problems you are having - it can seem pretty hopeless some days.  My Saffy didn't like to be alone when we got her seven years ago; she was a rescue and had been totally ignored apart from food for months...., we don't often know what their 'baggage' is, but the important thing is that she is with you now and you do say that progress is being made.  Make no mistake it will not be quick! I'm not qualified to go into training issues as such, but with Saffy we did things very slowly; ie going out of sight just for seconds then reappearing, then going out for a bit longer and building up the time.  We found it most important to be consistent, repetitive and above all normal   they will pick up instantly on anxious people around them  so try to act calm....Saffy is still not a huge fan of being alone for too long, but she is a different dog than the one we took on.  By the way she follows us everywhere - that's just what she does  

I should mention we didn't use a crate back then, but really wish we had done so now, as  Minimoo has said; we got a crate some time later when Saffy had some surgery and she loved it - crate is being used now for the puppy, but a lot of the time Saffy is in it - its a 'safe' haven...so I'd recommend one.

There's some excellent advice on this forum about SA and other stuff - no need to feel you are battling on your own!  good luck with Beth 

[Sarah.H]

She might not have had separation anxiety with her previous owners. I'm sure Millie being re homed to me when she was 18 months triggered some of the problems she now has. She really clung on to me which gave us some SA problems and also guarding issues. How much involvement does your OH have with her? Other than cuddles when he felt like it my OH never did much so I had to make him start getting involved so she didn't see me as the sole provider for her life. If you search COL you will find lots of threads about separation anxiety.

[LurcherGirl]

My 8-month old cocker also has/had serious separation anxiety issues and would scream the house down for hours (according to my very understanding neighbour). We have made lots of progress and she is now mostly fine. Apart from the training plan you have received (which I assume means leaving her for more and more time gradually increasing it, getting her used to being in a different room/you being in a different room etc), you could also try the following remedies which I have found very helpful with with separation anxiety issues (though depending on the dog, some work some don't, you would just have to try):

CSJ herbs: Calm Down
Homeopathic: Ignatia (to help with pining)
Bach Flower essences: depends on the individual dog and the underlying cause, but Walnut for helping with change and Aspen for helping with fear of the unknown as well as Rescue Remedy to help with shock and panic would probably be part of the remedy plan.

Have you tried a DAP diffuser?

A frozen stuffed kong? A large rawhide bone (or other safe chew) she only gets when you go out? A cardbord box with crunched up newspaper and treats hidden in it?

[watson20]

Thank you everyone, I just feel useless sometimes with trying to sort her out.

She is 5 years old and this is her 3rd home poor thing. She has a crate which she likes sleeping in but once the door is closed she starts to fret and will try to open it by pawing and pushing. When my trainer came to assess her she did say about doing crate training but we said no, but now think it may be best. When I spoke to my trainer last week she did say about starting it so may do so.

I have tried a DAP and that didn't make any difference, also serene-um which the vet recommended, that had no effect, so it does come down to pure training.

We are starting obediance classes which my husband will do to try and get a bond, also now on walks when she refuese to walk he dangles a bit of sausage and now she will walk lovely.

I know I sound a real drama queen and we have had her a couple of months but I can't help feeling like I've failed her. She starts to improve then she falls right backwards.

She is an absolutely lovely dog, and when at home she doesn't make a sound if anyone knocks at the door, it knowing she frets and barks/howls when I'm out which is really upsetting.

[minimoo]

 you havent failed her at all, look at what you have done so far to try and help her , the poor dog is on her third home , if she goes in a crate and is partial to a sausage, could i suggest you get a KONG and cook some sausage chop it up and stuff the knog and freeze it , not too frozen at first and give it to her in the crate, i do this before i got to work and my pups cant wait to get their treats, once she is used to it start leaving her for short periods, if shes into the sausage (or any other treat you can stuff a kong with) she may be kept occupied with her goodies, i dont make a fuss when i leave they have thier treat and im off out  , its worth a try but it wont work first time, please dont get too stressed out , you sound like you really want to help her and she sounds lovely and worth the effort

[maddy74]

I agree, you havnt failed here by getting someone in to talk about her behaviour and posting on here you are doing all the right things. Weve had our pup since she was tiny and had real issues leaving her at first, was reduced to tears some days. Willow loves 2 kongs filled with wet kibble and a spoon full of natural yoghurt when we go out. I hope things get better for you all soon, she sounds like a real sweetie xxxx

[spanielcrazy]

She is 5 years old and this is her 3rd home poor thing.

Aw, poor baby, this probably has a lot to do with the problem 

 I can't help feeling like I've failed her. She starts to improve then she falls right backwards.

Please don't feel this way. That is a very normal part of learning and re-learning for dogs; one step forward, one (sometimes 2!) steps back  It is called an extinction burst. It can be frustrating for us, but it really is normal 

http://dogtrainingbykate.com/?p=1722

You've gotten good advice here, and you have a plan from your trainer and it's wonderful that you are willing to do this for her  Best of luck!
 

[ali2010]

Hi, I do know how you feel, its very hard work.  We rehomed our cocker from a rescue place nearly a year ago.  I have to say that at first, although we loved him to bits, we thought we had made a huge mistake.  We had terrible problems with him initially with so many different things, aggression towards other male dogs and teenagers, separation anxiety etc etc.  Have to say that he is now like a different dog, so much more settled, I am so glad we stuck with it.

We ended up going to 2 different behaviourists, have put countless posts on COL for advice and went for a private lession with a dog trainer then group training sessions. 

I think our Albert still has a bit of separation anxiety although its hardly noticeable now.  I think the separation anxiety gets better with time as the dog learns to trust you.  We did the stuff your trainer recommended, shut him in another room and kept increasing the times etc and that did help although we quickly learned that shutting him in another room doesn't help if he starts to get upset, you shouldn't leave her if she gets upset, go back to her before she has the chance to get upset.

Wish I could provide you with more advice but I think probably we didn't handle things too well at first but would say that things will get easier with time and a lot of patience