2 inch bite on finger

[hle]

Just lots of reassurance and love. I had to persevere and it has taken a long time.  I never hurt him but just used a firm voice. Rewarding him for good behaviour and continually reinforcing it. Now he is the most loving and loyal dog ever. He really has changed! I still don't trust him 100% especially around children, although he has never given me any cause for concern. I am so glad that we tried and didn't give up on him. Hope you get there soon so that you can enjoy him. Have you thought about neutering? I know it seems a bit extreme but it may be an option if nothing else works.

[Top Barks]

I feel that I have to provide some light at the end of the tunnel. My Cody use to be just like that, I was so worried that he would never change and, as we had 2 young children it was not the sort of behaviour that we could ignore. He is now 3 and a half and much better behaved. I realise that he was very strong willed and wanted to be top dog. I had to be very firm but gentle with him. He now treats us as his pack leaders and will always move, drop or leave when told to. He is now quite submissive and often seeks reassurance from me. He is so obedient and loving, a very different dog! This has developed over about 3 years and I think it is completely based on trust. Cody has not bitten anyone since he was about 1. Hope things work out for you.

Just thought i had to post on this, I know a lot of you know my feelings on sorting issues like this on a forum  and Hle's advice just backed up my thinking.

You have to be so careful when giving behavioural advice because what works for one dog often will not work for another.
I certainly would not advocate being firm with a dog that is already biting!
I still have the scars of experience to back up the fact this approach can go wrong and create more mistrust.

Hle,
Do you really believe your dog wanted to be in charge? what led you to that conclusion?

I certainly would not want to be to firm with a dog that is already wary about it's owners and their actions towards him. Lynn it's all about identifying the triggers to the behaviour and working on them in a way Selby can cope with. By all means set rules and boundaries for Selby, but make sure they are achievable without conflict. don't get hung up on Nilif either as you have to adapt what you do to your dog. You can not use a one size fits all approach.
The big thing as well is that you must recognise his limitations at this time so you don't put him in a situation where he feels insecure. This sounds fear based, nothing to do with trying to take over your house, you need to look at how you interact with him now and in the future and learn some exercises that will help build his trust. It is very important that all your family sing from the same hymn sheet on this.
You have been given some good advice by others on the thread but i agree this is probably not a fad or an age thing but it is not to say you cannot turn things around.
Mark

[Top Barks]

Hle sorry if this and my last post sounds a bit personal but that is not my intent.
 I appreciate you are only answering Lynn's question with the best of intent.
I'm also so pleased what you did worked, but as i mentioned you cannot treat every dog in the same way and get the same results, if you could my job would be so easy and maybe a tad monotonous.
With some dogs there is no need to physically punish a dog, often a raised voice is enough, but does it create trust where their is mistrust?
The dog complies through fear surely?

I just think with the seriousness of aggression facts need to be right on such issues.

I am also a little wary of the suggestion of neutering it is often seen as a cure all when in reality it is far from it.
Podberscek and Serpell’s preliminary study on Aggression in the English Cocker Spaniel for instance revealed that neutering an adult dog in reaction to his aggressive behaviour does not reduce future aggression.

[mlynnf50]

Thank you all for you comments,  I have been in touch with the cocker rescue over here in Switzerland,
the lady speaks really good English, she has put me in touch with a person that is a behaviourist,(well I am waiting for them to ring me)  All this is really upsetting I can only think that the only thing I have done with Selby is put drops in his ears to clean them and I know he doesn't like that.

If you look back at my posts from him being small we have had problems, maybe its been my dealing with things that has been wrong, I hope I have not caused him to be so nervous I have never hit him, in fact maybe I have been too soft with him if that is possible.  The concensors is maybe it was because he didn't leave his home until he was 15 weeks I don't know.

I am in tears writing this, I love him so much and want things to work out he is a lovely little chap.

I will keep you all posted.

Thank you all

[dottysmum]

No advice, just wanted to give you my best wishes, I truly hope things work out for you.x

[Karma]

Just to reassure you, this isn't a reflection of you doing something wrong - dogs can be scared/nervous without having been mistreated in any way.  Different dogs need to be handled differently, and a behaviourist will be able to observe the signals Selby will be giving you and find the ways things that are going to work for you and for him.  The fact that he wasn't with you until 15 weeks may have had an impact on things, but he may have had the same issues even if he came to you at 8 weeks. 
Honey came to us at 8 weeks, and we worked hard at socialising her, but she is still a very nervous dog - most people who see her wouldn't recognise that as we've been able to work with her to help her manage, and we avoid situations which I know she wouldn't cope with.  She shies away from strangers, doesn't trust unfamiliar visitors to the house and new/unfamiliar objects can really stress her out.  Learning more about her body language and the signals she was giving us really helped, and we had great advice from people here and at our dog training school...
I have often wondered what would have come of her had she ended up in a different home - we've by no means done everything perfectly for her, and I'm sure we've made mistakes along the way, but I honestly believe that, had she gone to a home where the owners didn't take the time to understand how SHE worked and what she needed, she could well have ended up with serious, ingrained, behaviour issues...

Selby's behaviour is him communicating that he needs something different - you are doing the right thing by trying to find out what that is... 

One thing I would add is, at least until you have seen the behaviourist, don't hold onto his bones or take them away from him (even if he brings them to you) - it could be that this heightens his anxiety so that while he doesn't react at that, he transfers the stress onto higher value objects... if someone always kept hold of your dinner plate and occassionally took it away for a while, but brought it back, you might find it a bit annoying but bite your tongue and not say anything if it was someone who was generally very nice to you and who you respected... but if you had had a really bad day and felt stressed out (the state Selby is probably in during grooming) and you got yourself your favourite treat (glass of wine, chocolate bar - whatever would really de-stress you) and that same someone came along to take that off you, you'd probably snap... 

[Mel]

I really hope nothing I have said has made you feel it's your fault in any way, because that wasn't the intention.

If it's any reassurance, I got Keli at 13 and a half weeks and have virtually no trouble, yet I got Tali at 9 weeks and he's been and still is a challenge. There is a trigger though and I'm sure with the help of a behaviourist this can be established and a solution worked upon for you and Selby.

[mlynnf50]

Thank you, no I didn't take offence at any of the advice given I was just pleased that you took the time to try and help.

I contacted the cocker rescue here not to re home him but thought she would be the person to know who to contact, I will never give up on him unless it was for his own good, I love him to bits.

I have just been out with him and him running free and we have had such a good time, he really loves his mum and is soo good at times, I just hope that I can get into him and understand him better.

Will keep you all posted. thank you.x

[spanielcrazy]

Please don't look at it as that you have done something "wrong", you are just having a communication problem because you and Selby don't speak the same language.

Selby's behaviour is him communicating that he needs something different - you are doing the right thing by trying to find out what that is... 

I think that you can sympathise with Selbys frustration, I gather that you don't speak Swiss. You can probably communicate some very basic things with the Swiss, as you and Selby can, but when it comes to deeper or more complex communication you are stymied.

But hopefully the behaviourist will help tutor you in "Dog" and put you on the right track. It's very important though that you do not beat yourself up or look back. You need to show Selby a calm and confident demeanor, which in turn will help him become calm and confident. 

Keep us posted and wishing all the best for you and Selby