CockersOnline Forum
Cocker Specific Discussion => Behaviour & Training => Topic started by: JamieL on November 11, 2014, 01:40:37 PM
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Is rehoming the only option?
Hello all,
I'm hoping for some advice and words of wisdom from experienced owners about whether or not to rehome my 11 month old working cocker spaniel, Ollie or whether there is more that I can do for him before having to resort to rehoming. I feel truly awful, depressed and anxious about it so would please ask that you don't judge and criticise me, I feel bad enough and don't want to feel worse. Please try and understand :( I admit that I rushed into it and never expected it to be so much work and I feel terribly guilty and upset about that, please don't make me feel worse.
I got Ollie from a breeder when he was ready to leave his mum and I've had him everyday since and although I love him to bits I feel that the stress and upset that he causes massively outweighs the comfort and companionship he brings.
He is very excited and hyperactive and seems impossible to train. We live in a small house on a suburban estate so his walks are always on the lead and are restricted to walking around the streets which I know is far from ideal for working cockers. When he's on his lead he pulls so much that I can barely control him and he is so strong that he pulls me with him. Nothing seems to stop him doing this and it has reached the point where I absolutely dread taking him out. When he is off the lead he bolts so far in front of me that he can't even hear me calling him back and when he does hear me he doesn't come back anyway. I get so scared that he will see a dog on the other side of the road and run across. I'm ALWAYS worried and anxious when I'm out with him. His pulling is constant and at times my hands are red raw from holding the lead and trying to control him. I know walks shouldn't be like this for him or me.
When we are at home he does not sit still from the minute I get up. He paces around as if looking for something to do and nothing seems to keep him occupied enough for him to be relaxed and calm. He jumps on the couches and despite constantly putting him off the couch and telling him not to he just does it again and again. He doesn't go on the couch to sit and relax, I wouldn't mind that. He just gets up on them and jumps around or stand on all fours on there. Sometimes I just end up giving in and leaving him there.
When I want to relax he is jumping up at me so much that I can't watch something on TV or read a book as my concentration is constantly interrupted. A lot of the time he will jump up onto the couch where I'm sitting and actually stand on me with his front paws on my chest. Only physically picking him up and putting him down stops this, but then he just does it again. I feel like I don't have any peace whatsoever.
He runs around the living room and regularly knocks things over; glasses of juice, papers off the table, furnishings and decorative items in the home, basically anything knockable and within reach of his tail will be knocked and possibly broken. It has reached the point where I'm not replacing things that are broken or damaged because I just think he will do it again.
He is quite destructful and if not kept an eye on he will chew things around the house. When I first got him he would sleep in the kitchen, until he started chewing the bottom of the kitchen cupboards and the plastic pipe cover which conceals the pipes coming from the radiator. I decided to let him sleep in the lounge and the same thing happened, he chewed the skirting board. Recently he pulled a piece of floor beading off and chewed this into bits, I felt it was only a matter of time before he pulled the rest of it off that I bought him a cage and now leave him in there to sleep and when I go out. Caging him makes me feel cruel but we live in a rented house so really can't afford for him to be causing damage and destroying fixtures and fittings that I will have to pay to be repaired or replaced.
I try to keep him occupied with toys and chews but they don't last very long. He destroys soft toys VERY quickly, ripping them into shreds and leaving them strewn about all over the living room. The cost of having an endless supply of toys for him to destroy is ridiculous.
I have a medium sized grassy back garden for him to use but I quite simply dread letting him out there as he comes in and leaves a trial of black muddy paw prints right through the house. When he wants to go out he jumps up at the back door which jingles the keys which I hear and therefore get up and let him out. Sometimes he goes out for a few seconds and comes back in, so I close the door and sit back down, then I hear the keys jingling 10 seconds later, and he will do the same thing over and over again; make me let him out, come back in and then make me let him out again. This is absolutely horrible for me as I know that when a dog's wants to go outside he should be let outside...but not to the point where I am up and down every 30 seconds letting him in and out. Ignorance doesn't seem to make a difference as if I ignore him he just goes on and on.
I don't have many visitors at my house but on the rare occasions when I do I have to put him in another room as he gets so excited and worked up when he sees people that they don't actually enjoy it. He jumps up at them and will not calm down to the point that I'm embarrassed and uncomfortable about his behaviour. Then when he is upstairs he is scratching at the door and making so much noise, the after visitors have gone he is so worked up that he will run around the house and be extremely excited for a while after.
When I eat he jumps up at me and always wants what I have. If I am sitting down eating he will jump up and stand on me with his face millimetres from mine, every time I push him away he comes back.
When I go out he is constantly on my mind and I find myself rushing home to let him out of his cage as the idea of him being cooped up in there by himself makes me feel terrible. I feel that my life is not my own anymore.
After lots of consideration I decided to advertise him for adoption and arranged to meet two families last weekend. The first seemed ideal, a family living in a rural surroundings with their own land and where he wouldn't be walked but rather let out onto their fields to get as much exercise as he wants, chase birds and rabbits etc. It seemed perfect but after renting a car and driving 100 miles to visit them they didn't end up wanting him. They had another cocker who was the opposite to Ollie, very calm and placid and Ollie was just too much for them to handle. I had lined up another family nearer home so I took him there afterwards and they fell in love with him. I asked the father to take him for a walk so that I could leave without Ollie having to watch me go. It was a very painful experience. I had a terrible night and it was one of the worst evenings I've ever gone through, I was incredibly upset and felt painfully guilty and constantly shaky and worried whether I had done the right thing. Then at the crack of dawn the next morning the family called me and asked me to go back and collect him, I don't think they could handle him. I cried so much and now I feel like I am back where I started. The lady who took him said that during the night he was extremely distressed, unsettled and crying constantly which I was devastated to hear because the one thing that got me through the night was the thought that he will be happy and enjoying himself with his new family. Now I feel like nobody will want him and I'll be stuck in this cycle for the next 10+ years. I'm almost 30 and shouldn't be living like this at this point in my life.
When I went to collect him I took him to my mother's straight after. She could see how upset I was and said she would keep him for a few days so that I could have a break. I have been at a friends down South since Sunday trying to relax but all I can think of is the dog, whether there is more I can do, whether he will calm down with time, whether it's all my fault, or whether I am simply not cut out for it and he is better with another owner.
Can somebody please give me some words or support or advice. I just don't know what more I can do with him and I really feel like he is quickly draining the energy out of me and no longer brings me any pleasure. I keep telling myself it will get better with time but it feels as if it's getting worse over time. What can I do?
Sorry for the long post!!
Jamie
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oh Jamie you are in a pickle...
I'm no expert but i'm sure someone with
good knowledge will be along to give you
some advice so be patient...
could I ask ... have you done any formal
training classes with Ollie?
Going to give you this.... :bigarmhug:
I think you need it!
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Where do you live?
I think if anyone on here is going to be able to offer advice, they may need to meet Ollie. If anyone knows of a trainer/behaviourist, they will also need to know whereabouts you live.
I know a good trainer/behaviourist in the midlands, but she may be too far from you.
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Hi Jamie - I am so sorry you are going through this and, as you have found out, doing your homework before getting a dog is so important. I have 2 working cockers and I can't even imagine how they would be with only on-lead walks. They need a good run every day of at least an hour to an hour and a half if they are to settle.
Have you thought about something like Flyball or Agility with him?
If you really can't give him more exercise and stimulation then I think you are doing the right thing in re-homing him and please don't worry - there are lots of people out there who will relish having a working cocker - I know I do. I would suggest though that you go to a proper rescue centre to do it like Working Cocker Spaniel Rescue or CAESSR as they are trained in finding the right homes.
Big hugs for all you are going through :luv:
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We live in Liverpool.
He has never had any proper training classes. Do you think classes could help?
I've just been on the phone to the cocker and springer rescue asking questions and trying to get some reassurance that I'd be doing the right thing if I did hand him over to them for rehoming. I'm heartbroken because before I had Ollie I was always the first person so say that people who send their dogs for rehoming are monsters, cruel, etc and now I'm in that exact position.
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Hi Jamie,
I was going to suggest flyball or agility classes but JanD beat me too it. :003:
I have a 14 month old working cocker and I find that she needs to be mentally stimulated too. I don't do agility of flyball myself but I do take her to dog training two or three times a month and I find that helps her wonderfully. Where we go the instructor does different things each week from general obedience (which helps with the lead pulling) to sniffing training which she excels at. The mental stimulation tires her more than the physical on those days.
We also go to a canine hydrotherapy unit for "Fun swims" about twice a month. That is great exercise for them too maybe they have a similar thing near where you live. She sleeps like a baby when she gets home from that and she really enjoys it.
Hope you find the solution that suits you both, he's still very young and will calm down eventually ((hugs)) to you both
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He has never had any proper training classes. Do you think classes could help?
Yes as long as you find a trainer who
uses positive methods (maybe Apdt or similar)
Cockers have busy inquisitive minds and
giving them training sets up boundaries
for them and helps them focus...
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I think it will help a lot. ...But do go visit a few before you decide which one can offer the best for you and Ollie, as 8 Hairy feet said make sure it is "positive" methods they use as your dog will be happier to work with you.
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Hi Jamie, first I think training classes will be good for him but make sure its a trainer who uses positive methods . the crate is fine as long as its big enough and hes never put in it for punishment, I was at my wits end years ago with my second cocker Bruno , he had separation anxiety and would destroy my house, I finally got him a crate and he loved it I gave him a treat every day before I left him and he felt that the crate was his safe place. he eventually would go in and I would just leave the door open. He turned out to be the most clever beautiful dog ever :luv: :luv:. Have you got anywhere safe you can go to let him off leash to run off that energy, maybe throw a ball for him. if you do decide that rehoming him is the only answer please try and use a reputable rescue such as the ones janD suggested , they will be able to find the right forever home for him
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Have you heard of TTouch? There's a link here: www.ttouch.com (hope that works)
There's a TTouch practicioner in Meols which isn't far from Liverpool. Her name is Glynis Stewart, phone 0151 632 2094. Email: glynis@trendypooches.co.uk.
I had a TTouch practicioner's help with a previous dog's behaviour and my only regret is that I didn't contact her earlier.
Good luck with Ollie & please let us know how you get on ;)
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I don't have any advice for the behaviour I'm afraid but if you're looking for a secure place to walk him off lead, try this FB page
Dog Walking Fields - Securely Fences, Private, Off Lead Dog Walking areas
https://www.facebook.com/dogwalkingfields?pnref=lhc (https://www.facebook.com/dogwalkingfields?pnref=lhc)
You may be able to find something in your area
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Hello Jamie and welcome to COL :D
I'm sorry things have become so difficult for you and Ollie. He sounds like a normal, lively working Cocker puppy who needs more mental stimulation and exercise than he's getting at the moment. If you are able to provide that he's likely to become calmer and easier to live with, but being a working Cocker and young, he's still going to be a dog that requires a lot of owner input in the years ahead.
I'm pleased you've phoned a proper rescue (I'm guessing CAESSR), because if you decide to rehome Ollie that's much the best way to go. A good rescue will have the necessary experience to be able to assess Ollie so they know what kind of a home he will be suited to and then find him the right family and home. They will vet and homecheck potential owners and will always be there in the future as a safeguard if something should go wrong in the new home.
Please don't continue down the route of private rehoming. It can work, but there are lots of pitfalls and also some evil people out there who masquerade as families wanting pets but are a cover for dog fighting rings and puppy farms.
If you decide to keep Ollie some very good suggestions have already been made about taking him to training classes and, when he's had some training and has a good sit, stay and recall, trying agility or flyball with him. It isn't going to be easy because you're pretty much starting from scratch with him and will also be having him to train him out of things like pulling on the lead. But Cockers are smart little dogs and you'll probably find that once he's having some training the two of you will see each other in a different light and start to build up a bond.
Can you look ahead and see where you would like to be with Ollie in 6 months time? Do you have the time and commitment to go to training classes once or twice a week and do training at home and out on walks in between times? When you're at home are you prepared to do training and play games with him to help give him the mental stimulation he needs so you and he can both relax at the end of it? It's a big ask, especially through the winter months when dark evenings and bad weather make things more difficult. If you decide to keep him you'll have to commit to doing a lot of hard work on a daily basis to get to a point where you can both enjoy life together, but it will be very rewarding once you start to enjoy each other. If you can't commit to it then I honestly think it would be better for both of you if Ollie was rehomed through a proper rescue such as CAESSR.
Good luck with whatever you decide is best for both you and Ollie :D
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I think you have had some really good advice but reading your post I honestly think you would be doing the right thing by rehoming him through a reputable rescue. I just don't think the two of you are suited to each other, not that you are a bad person any more than he is a bad dog, but your lifestyles just aren't compatible.
He needs more exercise and more mental stimulation. He also needs someone who doesn't mind the muddy footprints and can cope with some general cocker madness. I have a show cocker and she is pretty well behaved but she does like to be on the sofa with me, she will wiggle herself into the gap between my face and a book if I'm reading and she wants attention and she does jump up (a lot!). Thankfully, she isn't as (hyper)active as some cockers. For that, I have a harrier/setter cross who needs lots of input and exercise which she gets but she certainly wouldn't be the dog for everyone and I don't think Ollie is the dog for you.
I feel that although you could take Ollie to training classes, he is never going to be the dog you want because it's not in his nature to lounge around the house, entertain himself, keep clean and enjoy trotting out for just a couple of lead walks a day, which is the lifestyle you are offering.
I really think if you decide to get another dog in the future, you should think about rehoming an oldie who would be content to lie quietly, enjoy pottering around etc. We have a 10-year-old ex-hunting dog we adopted a month ago. He had been abandoned and seeing him come out of his shell and start to enjoy home comforts is very rewarding.
It's obvious that you care about Ollie and wants what's best for him and I think the bravest thing to do would be to let him go and be rehomed through CAESSR or something similar. I'm sure they could find him a good home. Good luck.
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Dear Jamie
Do not feel bad about this. You are clearly thinking about your dog's welfare and have the dog's best interests at heart. Certainly look at other options such as agility or flyball or anything else that will provide work to do. That does depend on your ability and time as well of course.
Hoping it turns out well for you both.
Rodney
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As well as all the great advice you have received have you considered his diet? If he is eating a food with lots of additives this can add to his hyperactive behaviour. It also sounds like you are very anxious and in turn this will make Ollie anxious. My dog was very similar to yours when we got him, (although he is show type) changing his diet along with lots and lots of mental stimulation (mainly clicker training) he eventually calmed. Also look at the sticky about how to train a reliable recall, it does not happen overnight, but if you follow it to the letter it proves very effective. I wish you lots of luck in whatever you decide is best for you both.
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Hi. I second what everybody has said. It sounds like you have a very lively dog on your hands. If you are anxious the dog will pick this up.
Cockers are very determined dogs and you have to be even more determined when they are pushing themselves under your nose. If they have been fed, exercised, physically and mentally, then there is nothing wrong to expect them to relax by you.
All of the things you have described can be sorted with training but it requires lots and lots of work on your behalf. If you are near Runcorn then I can recommend K9BRATS. They are trainers, behaviourists and do agility.
You obviously care about your dog's welfare. Do not berate yourself if you decide to re home him. We had a collie at home when I was young which my mother could not cope with. He was rehomed. We were all distraught. The feelings will subside and you will move on. Good luck with whatever you decide.
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I really feel for you. Looking at it from a distance, I think rehoming is the very best thing for both of you. We had to do it once and it was agonising, but it worked out wonderfully for the dog. We had a muchloved Pyrenean who was literally destroying our house because we couldnt give her enough attention. We found a family who could take her everywhere with them, and she thrived. We kept in touch until our Pyrenean died of old age last year.
Dont think of it as a disaster -we all make mistakes and I think you might be better off recognising that it is not viable for you to have such an energetic dog, and that the dog would be much happier in a different environment.
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I think you have had some really good advice but reading your post I honestly think you would be doing the right thing by rehoming him through a reputable rescue. I just don't think the two of you are suited to each other, not that you are a bad person any more than he is a bad dog, but your lifestyles just aren't compatible.
He needs more exercise and more mental stimulation. He also needs someone who doesn't mind the muddy footprints and can cope with some general cocker madness. I have a show cocker and she is pretty well behaved but she does like to be on the sofa with me, she will wiggle herself into the gap between my face and a book if I'm reading and she wants attention and she does jump up (a lot!). Thankfully, she isn't as (hyper)active as some cockers. For that, I have a harrier/setter cross who needs lots of input and exercise which she gets but she certainly wouldn't be the dog for everyone and I don't think Ollie is the dog for you.
I feel that although you could take Ollie to training classes, he is never going to be the dog you want because it's not in his nature to lounge around the house, entertain himself, keep clean and enjoy trotting out for just a couple of lead walks a day, which is the lifestyle you are offering.
I really think if you decide to get another dog in the future, you should think about rehoming an oldie who would be content to lie quietly, enjoy pottering around etc. We have a 10-year-old ex-hunting dog we adopted a month ago. He had been abandoned and seeing him come out of his shell and start to enjoy home comforts is very rewarding.
It's obvious that you care about Ollie and wants what's best for him and I think the bravest thing to do would be to let him go and be rehomed through CAESSR or something similar. I'm sure they could find him a good home. Good luck.
I have to agree with this. I have an 18 month old working cocker and she isn't a dog you get if you want a quiet life! She has bags of energy, she always wants to be involved in things and a clean house is a thing of the past! >:( Training classes may help with some of the issues, but it sounds like you may just be too mismatched to be happy with each other.
Working cockers are great pets, but they do seem to be very much in vogue at the moment and they are often very high energy dogs who require a lot of mental and physical stimulation. They certainly aren't for everyone, and they aren't really dogs made for a quick walk round the streets on lead.
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firstly, please please please don't beat yourself up for considering re homing. You are trying to do what is best for your dog and sometimes accepting that you are not the right home is the hardest part of that.
You have had some fantastic advice and as someone who does both agility and flyball I can vouch for the fact they tire out dogs. BUT I can also say they do take up a lot of your free time. In the period between Easter and the start of October I have had 8 weekends where I've not been either competing or training - and most of those was because i was on call for work. My agility club trains tuesday nights in the summer too.
I think you need to sit down and decide what you want you're dog-related life to look like. Is it one where you take a leisurely walk around the park once or twice a day and then they curl up at home on your knee or by the fire? Or is it one where you and your dog are out and about having adventures, learning new things, meeting new people and dogs, spending weekends away (possibly camping or caravanning - i'm on my 4th tent!)
If it's the first one then a working cocker is going to struggle to fit into that picture. A show line might, or another breed but a worker is going to find that life frustrating and take its frustrations out on its surroundings.
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You have had some good advice and ideas, but to be perfectly honest, it sounds like you have a very bored and frustrated dog :shades: It is not likely to get better or change unless there is a dramatic change in his lifestyle.
Working cockers are not really best suitable to a pet home like the one you have described. Unless you are prepared or able to take a lot of time and commitment to do active things with him, then you really have to consider his welfare and let him go. A couple of on lead walks a day will simply not do for a working breed with high energy like you have described. I have a show type and she is high energy too and she is 9 now :o- she really needs at least a couple of hours a day running around off lead or doing some sort of activity. Working cockers are usually more demanding that this.
I really think the kindest thing you can do is to contact a reputable rescue like Working Cocker Spaniel Rescue or CAESSR and see if they can find him a more suitable home. I know it will be hard and heartbreaking but it sounds like he really needs to be in a completely different environment and the sooner the better. The behaviour you describe is not the sign of a bad dog, but a dog that is totally frustrated, bored and unable to do what he was meant to do, which is to be out all day (or at least part of the day) being busy!
Sorry if this is not what you want to hear, but you need to put his needs first here and do what is best for him. :-\ It does not make you a bad owner - many people on here have had to rehome dogs for various reasons - in most cases, it is the kindest thing you can do for your dog.
Good luck whatever you decide.
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There is an organisation called The Dog Barn at St Helens who do all sorts of dog training from basic puppy stuff to agility and flyball. I know absolutely nothing about them but they are local to you and might be worth a try. Your dog sounds as though he would be good at those sort of things and who knows - you might be too!
Don't dispair - I'm sure you will find a solution that makes you both happy.
Good luck
Rodney
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I'm sorry you are having to consider re-homing your dog. Working cockers, although very cute and sweet looking, are bred be active and bright and if their brains aren't exercised as well as their bodies they can become stressed, bored and destructive.
I would suggest rehoming or using his working ability and getting some gundog lessons. If he is already hyper more exercise is not going to calm him down - he needs to use his brain more.
re - the mud - that's what having a working cocker is all about I'm afraid :-
Good luck with whatever you decide - I'm sure he would settle into a new home. He sounds quite anxious at the moment so any change is going to be difficult until consistency sets ;)
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Thank you for all of your replies and advice. As agonising as it is I really think that it will be better to rehome him. I have arranged for his kennel cough vaccination tomorrow with a few to letting CAESSR take him and find him a new home. In the meantime I will spoil him and make sure he knows he is loved.
Moneypenny: When you rehomed your dog...did the pain ever go away or does there reach a point when the guilt of giving him up will subside? I'm terrified in case I feel upset about it forever.
Has anybody here adopted a dog who'd been given up for rehoming? Will the dog get over it, will he be distressed or will he take it all in his stride? My impression of dog kennels are a doggy jail where dogs get very distressed.
Thank you again for your replies and kind words.
Jamie
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You are making a truly difficult decision and big hugs to you. :bigarmhug: :bigarmhug: :bigarmhug:
If it's any consolation I am sure a young pup will be very quickly rehomed. Have you contacted CEASAR yet? I think young pups are often fostered and not kept in kennels too.
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I have rehomed a dog who was about 1yr when I got him. He came with many issues but I managed them throughout his 13years. He was however a very loving and loyal companion. It will hurt you but I`m sure its the best for everyone concerned. :bigarmhug:
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Thank you for all of your replies and advice. As agonising as it is I really think that it will be better to rehome him. I have arranged for his kennel cough vaccination tomorrow with a few to letting CAESSR take him and find him a new home. In the meantime I will spoil him and make sure he knows he is loved.
Moneypenny: When you rehomed your dog...did the pain ever go away or does there reach a point when the guilt of giving him up will subside? I'm terrified in case I feel upset about it forever. I took on a dog who for some reason the owners didn't walk her and she was left alone for 9 or 10 hours at a time (man was car salesman and wife was a policewoman) she was 7kg overweight at 2 years old and very very naughty, she would steal food, open child gates, move chairs to climb onto the work tops and much much more . she missed her owners who had had her from 9 weeks for a while but loved her walks and swimming and the lifestyle I could give her and is an extremely happy girl :luv:
Has anybody here adopted a dog who'd been given up for rehoming? Will the dog get over it, will he be distressed or will he take it all in his stride? My impression of dog kennels are a doggy jail where dogs get very distressed.
Thank you again for your replies and kind words.
Jamie
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Good for you, I really do think this is the right decision for you, and even more so, for your dog. ;) I am sure he will not be in rescue for long and they will ensure that he is placed in home that can meet his needs in terms of exercise, training and activity. It will take him a little while to adapt, but dogs live in the moment and I am sure he will soon settle down. In fact I am sure he will get used to the new regime faster than you will :-\ As has been said, he may well spend some time in a cocker savvy foster home where his temperament and needs can be properly assessed.
I have never been in this situation thank goodness, but I know I would find it difficult to come to terms with. However, you will have done the best thing FOR HIM by recognising that at the moment you are not able to give him the sort of home he needs , despite the pain it will cause you :'( That makes you a good and caring owner - never let anyone else make you feel otherwise. :shades: I hope your friends and family will be supportive of your decision and help you come to terms with it in time. Please do not beat yourself up about this - sometimes it just does not work out no matter how much you want it to, but just imagine how you would cope with this situation if it continues - not good for your doggy friend either. Now, he is young enough to adapt and learn to have a different routine that will better suit his needs and activity levels ;)
Stay strong. Sending hugs from here :bigarmhug:
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Have you considered Working Cocker Rescue ? They have loads of experience with working cockers and will know what type of home is right for your dog.
Don't beat yourself up about it, I think you are doing the best thing for your dog.
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If it helps you at all my current dog - a working cocker/cavalier cross who also has lots of energy came to me at 14 months old when his owners had to go overseas. I assume it was a work related issue. He is a dog who had been loved and cared for and that made it much easier for him to settle into a new home. It is rather like children going for adoption or fostering. If they have learned to trust and make attachments in one home it is so much easier for them to do the same in a new home. I have also rehomed dogs who have been abused and it is much harder for them because they have no reason to trust people.
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I am sure that he will settle into it much quicker than you will adjust to him not being around but rest assured I am certain you have made the right decision and by going through a reputable rescue they will find him a home better suited to his needs. Just because you could not offer a high energy working cocker the right kind of home doesn't necessarily mean that no dog is right for you and maybe in the future when the pain subsides a little you may be able to find a companion better suited to what you have to offer.
Big hugs for you and your selfless decision :bigarmhug: :bigarmhug:
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CAESSR are very successful at rehoming the dogs who do go into their care.
Although this is not a condition of adopting and there is no guarantee when giving a dog up that this may happen to you, but you 'may 'be able to find out what happens to Oliie. if you look at the letters pages of the site, there are often updates of certain dogs by their new owners :luv: I think this is a wonderful thing to do as it reassures the previous owner that they did do the right thing, but as I said before, there is no guarantee that this will happen in your case, just a possibility.
Sadly, I know you are not the first and certainly won't be the last person who takes on a working cocker as a 'pet' and find it very very difficult. Yes, it can work out (I did it 7 years ago and my dogs are wonderful) but it can be very hard particularly when they are young.
I blame the breeders of these dogs who are not placing their puppies in the correct homes and just thinking of the money. Most responsible breeders will insist on a working or very active home for their puppies as they know what they have been bred to do and what they need. Sadly, I think it will get even worse as working cockers become more popular. More and more puppies will be born to 'non working' parents who have all the drive of the breed but none of the biddability creating little whirlwinds. >:(
If you do decide to rehome Ollie, please take comfort from the fact that CAESSR will take the trouble to match him to the best possible home for his needs. You obviously love him very much so do what is right for him. :bigarmhug:
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3 out of our 5 dogs have been pre owned including our worker Gemma. what ever their history all have settled down and been loving companions. Gemma was handed to us on the doorstep with no belongings ( not even a collar) and the door shut on us. that little dog sat on my lap in the car without a whine or look back.
I think most rehomers expect a challenge so do not worry. I only wish I could take him :luv:
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Hi. I can only endorse what others have said and I can't imagine anyone on here would judge you. I think I've made every mistake possible in the dog-owning stakes, and you're to be highly commended for taking advice regarding going through Working Cocker Rescue or CAESSR etc., and not trying to privately rehome or sell on your dog. Lord, the stories you hear when you work or volunteer in rescue can be horrendous - dogs passed around on Facebook etc - it's awful.
Your dog is so young a good spaniel rescue will get him in a good home and he'll never look back, but you should do it sooner rather later for both your sakes.
We currently own 3 rescue dogs - 2 are working cockers and we were lucky enough to get ones that had had a lot of time and effort put into them - they settled immediately and never looked back. Our third is a springer we adopted a couple of months ago - she's quite ancient so took much longer to settle and can be a grumbleguts, and - er - I'm still trying to teach her to sit :luv: . Says a lot for my training skills. This lady only sits when SHE wants to.
The dogs are kennelled where I volunteer and, honestly, you shouldn't feel sorry them - they are the lucky ones. Most of them cope amazingly well, even the akitas and huskies that stay for months, and you'd be surprised how much the staff gets attached to them all. Those dogs that do stress are usually found a foster home, even if it's only very temporary to give them a holiday. I can tell you that a cocker coming in will not be there more than a week or so, even though a specialist home has to be found. Also, I often see dogs I've helped rehome out and about when walking my dogs and they're without exception doing great. If sometimes they do not, they come back to rescue and find the right home second time around. We are the second shot at a rehome for 2 of our dogs and, what wasn't right for them in their first rehome is right in their second. We had a mad drama queen of a GSD in a couple of years ago that I still meet on walks. She was not good with other dogs and pulled like a train and wasn't particularly pleasant when I knew her. She now has another GSD as a sister and passed her gold KC citizenship award this year. Most folks that take rescue dogs are just nice people and, as another poster said, go the extra mile.
I just wish everyone did what you are doing, as hard as it is for you. Please let us know how you get on.
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re - the mud - that's what having a working cocker is all about I'm afraid :-
or any dog really ;)
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Jamie,
Sorry I missed your post. Although our Pyrenean was a treasured part of our family and it broke our hearts to let her go, the truth was that she ended up far happier with her second family because they could give her the time and energy we couldn't. So I have always felt really good about the decision. I really think you will feel the same.
Everyone has given you really good advice, and I'm sure things will work out
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Such a hard decision for you but you are thinkng about the dog and that is the best thing you could do.
As a lot have already ready said no-one would judge you on here and good advice has been given.
Don't worry CAESSR will make sure he's re-homed with the right people and he'll be so much happier.
Sending big hugs to you for doing the right thing. :bigarmhug: :bigarmhug:
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Thank you, Linda. I dropped him off at CAESSR yesterday. Heartbroken but know it's for the best.
Thank you all for your advice and kind words
Jamie
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:bigarmhug: :bigarmhug: :bigarmhug:
Well done for loving him enough to put his needs before your own, a very difficult decision, but by going through an experienced rescue you know he will go to a special experienced spaniel home.
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Well done for putting your own feelings for him to one side to do the best thing for him. :clapping: I am sure they will find him a wonderful active home where he will become a different dog. Once he is in a different environment and doing all the things he was bred to do, his life will change completely. :luv:
I could kill those breeders who breed these working dogs and try to con people into thinking they will be suitable for a normal pet home. >:D Sorry you have had to go through this, but hopefully at some time in the future, you will be able to offer a home to a dog that is more suited to the sort of home you have to offer - and there are many such dogs :-\
Did they say if you would be able to have an update on what happens to him from now on?
You have done one of the kindest and most difficult things any dog owner can do, so don't ever feel that you have not been a good owner to him. I know you are heartbroken at the moment, but try not to beat yourself up. Sending some of these from here :bigarmhug:
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Could not have said it better than Joules.
You have done the right thing. It will hurt now but will get easier in the knowledge that he will be living life to the full
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Could not have said it better than Joules.
You have done the right thing. It will hurt now but will get easier in the knowledge that he will be living life to the full
Totally agree. Sending loads of :bigarmhug: :bigarmhug: :bigarmhug: to you.
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Never an easy decision :bigarmhug: :bigarmhug:
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I have been watching the CAESSR site to see if there was any news about Ollie.
Today I noticed he has been rehomed already :D :banana: :banana:
I'm really pleased for the little lad and hope it eases JamieL's heart that she did the right thing by putting Oliie's needs first and hopefully he will now live his life to the full. :D
A lovely happy ending :luv:
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Great news :D. Will close this thread now he has gone to his new home :luv: