CockersOnline Forum

Thanks both. He has free range now if the kitchen when we are out which is quite a large room and has a utility. He has a couple of favourite spots but doesn’t go to them when I’m out. I’m thinking of buying a really snuggly bed to leave by the gate for when I’m out and could pop a top of mine in it too.

We can’t fit a stairgate over our stairs hence keep him constrained to the kitchen so he can’t roam the house.

Aww yeah-I'd lose the crate in the daytime now personally-let the little pooch have some freedom. I can't help wondering if crating in such a small space must seem to the dog like you going out equals being locked up, which would surely then mean a negative association with you going out. ?? I'm probably wrong-just a thought.
Like bizzylizzy said-keep it short to start with and see how she is.
Personally from very young age we just made sure ours was in the kitchen with no hazards (and all the chairs tucked in....)and left her to it. I just always think what if the dog was in a little crate and there was a fire or something. Or your car breaks down and you're unexpectedly gone for ages. Eek- that's just me but I'm not a fan anyway.
Once ours was fully housetrained we left her in the kitchen with a dogflap so she can get out to the loo. As far as we know, when we're out she just snoozes on a chair. She only plays up to annoy us. If we're not there she doesn't bother! But she's really fine about being left. As soon as we make a move for the front door she jumps on her chair.
Our dog is weird-she'll chew things if we're there but won't touch a thing if we're out.
Like she chases the cat and then when she thinks you're not looking, you'll catch them spooning in front of the woodburner!!
She is in fact hilarious when I go to work..She sees me get my work clothes on and gets all excited.and.jumps in her chair ready to..... wait. I always give her a chew or something when I go to work. I thought it would be a distraction and give her something nice to chomp on when I'm out, but no.
My husband comes in from work a couple of hours after I've left and the chew is still there, right under her nose. He will then take her out, and then give her her dinner.
Only when I come home will she go yay!! And go and get the chew. She is the most bizarre dog I have ever met.
Really good at getting the wrong end of the stick and still very much a work in progress!

Hope it goes smoothly with yours-I'm sure she'll be fine.

It’s interesting things improved around the 20 minute mark as he is usually fine for around 20 minutes so I’m hoping that as his threshold isn’t super low and he is still young that we can turn things around again quickly. I had to leave him once for 3 hours as had no choice and he just sat silently by the gate waiting for me. I would obviously prefer him to relax enough to sleep but at the moment I would definitely be happy with silent waiting!

He is in general a very chilled and calm puppy, no crazy cocker at all. He is getting much better at not being my shadow when I’m at home. So I keep hoping he will just improve but I’ll keep trying with the training anyway.

We had setbacks too, felt like it was not helping at all in the beginning. And we've even had a few times years after the worst of it when she had shorter periods of being anxious again. Luckily it didn't take as much training to get her out of it the other times.
"They" say it ruins the progress if you push them by leaving them too long. I am not sure. I'm guessing it depends on the individual dog? I remember being super by the book in the beginning. But then when she could handle 20 min or so I believe is when I started to sometimes leave her for longer from time to time. Like you said, it can get really difficult to avoid it. And I also feel like we got to a point in the training where I was being too predictable and anxious myself. So for us I think it helped that I just had to risk two hours and let us both see that we survived it. Maybe someone with more experience with dog training knows. I am guessing with some dogs it only slows the training down, maybe others regress more? But if the anxiety is getting worse, then maybe now is a sensitive time for whatever reason? If I remember correctly they are a little emotional and scared of "ghosts" around the time they reach puberty. I am guessing that can complicate home alone training too? I don't know, but sometimes there is no way to avoid leaving them, all we can do is our best. I think most of us follow the "recipe" most of the time, but then have to break the rules and hope for the best on occation...Sorry I'm not more help, I only have my one worried cocker for reference. My experience with all anxiety related issues is that you train and see very little progress. You make some mistakes, but try to to everything perfectly as much as possible. And then one day, when you are about to give up, it starts falling into place 

Thanks Mari, yes hope was what I was after! But tips gratefully received too. That must be lovely to finally see yours relaxed and snoozing.

That’s a good idea about leaving a treat in another room. But wouldn’t he just go and get the treat and bring it to where I am? Or do I close the gate to leave him with the treat but sit within eye shot outside the gate?

He was doing so much better so I’m not sure why he has regressed. I must have pushed him too far.

I don’t really have anyone to help with him unfortunately, so have to leave him sometimes. Last night was parents evening and my husband was away (he travels a lot and works long hours) so I had to leave him. I bring him to as much as I can such as football training, cross country meets etc but we skipped swimming lessons for weeks so have just started back to that as still have to pay for it.

I’m so confused hearing about people who get a puppy and take a week off to settle it in and then leave it all day with just a dog walker or someone popping in halfway through the day. How?? Really??

The good news is he is happy being left with my husband or even with one of the kids in a room with him if I’m upstairs. So although he is definitely most attached to me he is fine with other people too.

Does it really undo everything to go over threshold sometimes? I just don’t see how I can avoid that some days.