Author Topic: Separation Anxiety  (Read 7195 times)

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Offline Eljay

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Separation Anxiety
« on: November 06, 2002, 11:00:27 PM »
Hello Everyone,

Am new to all this, but need some help.PLEASE. ???

We have a beautiful blue roan cocker pup (Alfie) now 14weeks old. He has settled in well and the house training is going very well, BUT, he howls at night when I go up to bed and then when he wakes in the morning. If we go out he howls and cries the whole time we're gone. Neighbours have told me, (so set video camera up, and it's true.!!!!)

I always leave the radio on and he has a ticking clock and a hot water bottle in his bed. Once we're back he's fine. Am not sure what else to try. He is not left on his own very often.

Thanks
Lou.                    
Alfie, and Jay J. together over the Rainbow Bridge. Always in our hearts but dreadfully missed.

Offline Mike

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Separation Anxiety
« Reply #1 on: November 06, 2002, 11:11:03 PM »
Hi Lou

I'd say the way to go is start getting Alfie (nice name  :D) used to being left alone by leaving the room for very short periods - even 5 mins at a time. During which time, you shouldnt respond to any of his cries. Gradually increase the amount of time to 10 mins, then 15, 30, and so on. You should see a gradual improvement in his ability to realise that being left alone doesnt mean that you're not coming back. At the moment, he's kind of being thrown in at the deep end, so to speak, and is panicking a little - hence the howling. But dont worry, with a bit of training, he'll be fine  ;)

The radio is a good tool to use (I also leave the portable tv on in the kitchen), and make sure he has toys to play with. I also found it helpful to have a good play with my pup before I had to leave the house/go to bed, to make her tired, and so sleep, when I wasnt there.

Hope this helps!                    

Offline Lisa

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Separation Anxiety
« Reply #2 on: November 19, 2002, 11:29:43 AM »
Hi,

I just got Daisy this weekend she is 8 weeks old and a blue roan...she has completley turned out lives upside down.
She seems to have settled in well and toilet training is also going well...she is very bright and catches on quick.
Again we seem to have the same problem...every time we go to bed she crys and howls all night and really works herself up...I have tried the clock, the radio etc but nothing seems to clam her down..any other tips?
We can't leave her alone for a second at the moment and she needs constant attention. We have built a pen in the house for her when we pop out for two minutes to make our tea or whatever but all she seems to do is scratch at it and cry....any tips on how to get her to settle into it?

Other than that she is so cute and playful...I love having her around ;D ....any idea on what age cockers are fully toilet trained and can accept being left alone for half an hour...I know this will vary?


Thanks
Lisa                    

Offline Jane S

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Separation Anxiety
« Reply #3 on: November 19, 2002, 01:34:27 PM »
Hi Lisa

I'm afraid you are going to have to harden your heart & be a lot tougher - the only way that Daisy will learn that she cannot have attention all the time is if you don't respond to her all the time. At the moment, she has learnt very quickly (you said she was bright :)) that if she cries, howls, scratches etc, then you come to her & give her what she wants - your attention. Cockers can be little monkeys for attention-seeking - if they could be with you 24 hours a day, then they would be :) However, you can train Daisy not to be so demanding just by ignoring her & refusing to give her attention on demand. This sounds hard I know but you really have to be cruel to be kind or you will end up with a puppy who cannot be left alone. At night, make yourself ignore the noise she makes (wear earplugs if necessary & warn the neighbours if you have thin walls :)). During the day, put Daisy in her pen for short periods & again ignore any noise she makes - this will not harm her & she will eventually learn that yelling & making a fuss gets her nowhere. You must be consistent & not give in to her noise - it's hard but it will pay off :)

As to when a puppy is fully house-trained ie completely reliable at all times, then that's anything from 6 to 8 months. Some puppies are much quicker to learn than others but you can't expect Daisy to have full bladder control for a good few months yet. She should however be able to physically control herself for half an hour but while you are teaching her to accept being alone, she will maybe pee more (as getting excited/stressed often makes a pup want to pee and/or poo)                    
Jane

Offline Logan

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Separation Anxiety
« Reply #4 on: November 19, 2002, 01:39:45 PM »
I know exactly what you mean - my pup was a nightmare  :-.  There wasn't one thing in particular that made her cope better with being on her own, only time and patience.

I did what Mike has suggested, leaving her for short periods, and lenghtening them, making sure not to make a fuss of her on departure or arrival so she didn't see my going as a 'big thing'.  Make sure to make the times alone short to begin with so they know you ARE coming back.

Other than that I don't know what to suggest, just be patient, but don't give in immediately to puppy demands - Brio was on the brink of thinking 'if I whine I get attention' which was not good.  We invested in a child gate on the stairs and to the kitchen and when we ate she could see us but not get to us (one hell of a noise for the first few times she was excluded) but she got better.

Another  thing that helped was at puppy training - half way through we have a coffee break and chat about the little monkeys.  They are tied to 'dog posts' and ignored.  The first week was very loud but over the weeks they calmed down and now (7 weeks later) they all settle down quietly and wait.

Brie is now 5 months old and will quite happily sit in the car alone while I do the shopping or in the house in her crate for a couple of hours.

At the beginning she was 2 weeks constant whining overnight, but then suddenly - nothing (good job, I needed the sleep!)

So good luck and just persevere - its quite normal, if annoying.

love
Logan
xxx                    

Offline Pammy

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Separation Anxiety
« Reply #5 on: November 19, 2002, 06:23:30 PM »
In addition to what has already been said - try not to develop a obvious routine that they can then associate with you leaving them. If they find themselves alone without realising - you are more likely to be able to praise them for being good. Try leaving them in a room while you go in another room. Simply leave the room and close the door - don't make any fuss at all. Return to the room again making no fuss, leave again etc etc. This will help the puppy realise that you will go out - but that you come back too without them having to do anything.

You do have to be firm at night though. Try and make the place they are left really nice for them and somwhere they associate with nice things happening. Feeding time, some play - but also a nice resting place.

hth                    
Pam n the boys

Growing old is compulsory growing up is optional

Offline Eljay

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Separation Anxiety
« Reply #6 on: November 19, 2002, 10:50:13 PM »
Hi Lisa,

Hope you are getting some improvement. They are such loving dogs arn't they.  :) Alfie is getting better, but it's a slow process as I can't leave him to cry too long at night as he wakes the children up as well as us. But having said that when I come down I let him out for a wee and then speak to him firmly and don't make a fuss of him and he does settle for a few hours. Sometimes going through the night. He has such an adorable face it's very hard not to just cuddle him and take him up to our room. But I'm trying to be good.  ;D He has been out for his first walks this weekend and it was all very exciting for him as he met some other dogs in the orchards. He slept well that night!!! ;D Anyway wishing you lots of luck and hours of fun.

Lou. :)                    
Alfie, and Jay J. together over the Rainbow Bridge. Always in our hearts but dreadfully missed.