Riley and an update on our circumstances

[Miadanu]

So sorry to read that things didn't work out as you hoped  I was in the camp who thought you should wait until Diesel was older but even then it'd be no guarantee that they'd get on.  I can't imagine how difficult the past few weeks have been for you all; kudos to you both for rehoming Riley and keeping the best interests of the dogs at heart.  Perhaps over time and walks together they'll eventually tolerate one another - even if they are never best friends.

This very thing is why I keep having second thoughts about getting a second dog late 2012 ourselves.  We can do as much research as we like but at the end of the day it comes down to the temperament of the two dogs concerned.  We can hope for happiness but heartbreak is all too frequent.

Keep posting - like to see how Diesel grows up  

[c19unn]

Thank you so much for your comments - The OH was not willing to let the pup leave - with him being my pup It ende up being my choice - he believed that in tine they would be fine but I couldn't take the risk of one of them getting hurt - I wouldn't take the risk of getting another one - we were extremely lucky that Riley had a good home to go to within the family but I really don't want to put any other pups in a position where we would have to hand them back or rehome as it's such a shame - I knew it would be difficult with training but when you have a situation where just keeping them from getting hurt is your main priority the training just seems to be even harder - the great thing is that the OH dad wants to bring Riley along to future col meets so he can spend time with diesel in a situation where the two are not just in each others company - we tried taking diesel along to oh the other night to see how he got on with Riley there but I ended up having to leave with diesel as he started on riley as soon as we got there - we are going to meet up for walks after Xmas and new year to see how they are after a couple of months . Give them both time to settle and when Riley will be bigger and a bit older then at least we can still take them out together in the future if they are ok
Me and the OH slowly getting back on talking terms as he spent the last couple of days giving me and diesel the cold shoulder, it's been so sad that they didn't get on and I'm not sure diesel would ever accept another dog especially now and to be honest I don't mind as I have learned so much from this and it's true that you can never really know hoe they will get on

Lindsey thank you for replying - I was hoping you would and I'm glad you are ok with replying to my posts - i understand exactly why you said to wait and to be honest I couldn't really say if he would have accepted another dog even later on in life - he seems to get very jealous. I knew it would be hard but I in no way imagined that this would ever be the outcome or diesel reacting so severely
As always I do appreciate your input and I'm glad that you are there still to give advice - its difficult to imagine the worst case scenarios sometimes and I think that I just assumed that they would get on. Hindsight Is a wonderful thing but is not good when you can't change things. It has really shook us all up OH more than anyone as my main concern with diesel still feeling loved. Thank you for posting Lindsey it has meant alot :-) in the past you all have been so excellent with advice and I have appreciated it all - I want you to know that I do take the responsibility of diesel and at the time Riley as the most highest of priorities but I do believe that ou said what you said to try and avoid this situation - I wouldn't have known how it was going to turn out but you are all there to prepare me for the worst that could happen and I didn't think it would end up like this - I guess that dogs, like humans can react completely out of character when put in a situation that they feel is uncomfortable and I just assumed that diesel didn't have that side to him

Again thanks everyone for all your comforting comments and I apologise for going on the defines so aggressively previously - COL has been great to me and I had to do the right thing in admitting that things didn't work out as I had hoped and explain to you all what happened as I felt like id have been a coward not admitting that I had not managed to keep the 2

Charlene

[angie68]

So sorry to hear that it didnt work out with Riley.  Unforetunately we can never predict how things will work out.  The best solution is that you have been able to rehome Riley to a home where it sounds like he will be very happy.
Angie x

[fiona2]

 

[Choc-Chip]

I admire you Charlene for letting everyone know how little Riley and Diesel were getting on. Really really sorry to hear it didn't work out but I guess in the end at least he's still in the family and you will get to see him. OH will come round eventually, may just take a while. It's hard knowing whether 2 pups will get on and sometimes you just have to wait and see. I have 2 with only 11 months between them and they get on great. Was hard at first though as our third dog didn't really like Woody. Was never nasty or anything but just took a while to get used to him but it could've been harder if it didn't work out so can't imagine how you feel. I guess I've just always took it for granted that they'll got on. big hugs to you though. Look forward to seeing some more pics of little Diesel soon

[pipkoi]

Lovely to ear from you but I'm so sorry that things didn't work out for you all. However the outcome seems to be a "best of all worlds" decision & hopefully Diesel & Riley will grow up knowing one another & will eventually get on

[luckypenny]

Thanks for the update Charlene - I was wondering how things were going. It must have been so upsetting for you both (esp. your OH by the sounds of things), but by being honest about your experience it just adds to the whole COL "library" of info., and may, along with load of advice from other experienced COLers, help others considering a second pup.    
Sounds like Diesel just didn't fancy sharing his Mum - hope he's back to his cuddly self soon, and that he and Riley do develop a good relationship over time.

[Karma]

I must admit I've steered clear of the threads discussing your second pup because I am another in the camp of later is safer... however I always am (and would have been in your case) delighted to be proven wrong, and am so sorry that it hasn't worked out for you.      (And to add, when I first joined the forum I was seriously considering 2 pups at once and it was only my OH who put his foot down to say we couldn't which stopped me - so I can completely understand the desire to add to your doggie family)

Making that decision to rehome a pup is heartbreaking, and I know you must be in peices, but you have managed to do what many other people here have done before you, which is put the needs of the two dogs you care deeply for before your own hurt emotions.  I can only applaud you for that. 

And, while I am in the later is safer camp, there really are never any guarantee when it comes to dogs... you may have found the same situation had you waited and introduced a pup once Diesel was older.  We attempted to foster a dog a couple of years ago, and it was an absolute disaster - as you experienced the behaviour of both dogs was deteriorating, and we couldn't enjoy time with either one... while I felt terrible at the time for letting down a dog I was supposed to be helping, the situation really wasn't doing anyone any favours at all. 

It will take time to heal from the hurt of your experience, but you know Riley is in a fantastic home - and you have the bonus of being able to see him grow up once the wounds are less raw.  Hopefully Diesel and Riley will become great friends now they don't have to compete in the same living space. 

[jennycockerspaniel]

I have been wondering how you and your puppies were and sent you a messageI am so sorry they didnt get on and it must have been heartbreaking for you Looking forward to hearing how you all are and enjoying you pictures and looking forward to seeing some more.

[Liz F]

There are no certanties with dogs, could go either way, sorry it didnt work out for you  seems you have made the best decision for Diesel & Riley.
Glad you have come back to COL, everyones here to give informed advise 

[Kaz]

plenty of these Charlene 

 I spoke out as I did, for this very reason    ......for you too, aswell as both the pups    

Without wanting to patronise you Hun - you are young & I could see the pitfall & heartache ahead of you. I would say it again too, if the situation arose - if it could stop someone from feeling the pain you & especially your OH feel right now, then it would be worth it.
Life is a lesson - every minute of every day, opportunities come along that can help mold us to the person we choose to be - some lessons much harder than others. This, I guess, a most painful one for you but because of where you have been, you too will be able to give advice & use the lesson you have learnt to help someone else from making the same mistake 




Hi Lindsey,
Sorry I think what I typed came across wrong I was just trying not give my own personal opinion on the situation, but I wish Charlene and both dogs all the best.

Advice from others on the forum is quite often first hand knowledge & experience & given to help, not to mar anyones happiness   

By ignorance we mistake - by mistakes we learn 

glad you have come back hun       it is never my intention nor place to upset a fellow member to leave the forum 
 

Hi Charlene,

Was wondering how you got on with the new addition, obviously everyone will have their opinions on the situation, but at the end of the day it has nothing to do with any of us. We have all made mistakes in the past, is Diesel your first dog? Anyway here's hoping that peace resumes quickly and maybe enjoy having him all to yourself.

Don't worry about OH he will come round, they usually do... Maybe the dogs will get on later in life if they meet on neutral ground. Either way, hope both dogs are feeling a bit more settled as are you and your OH.

Kaz

Whilst I respect what you are saying Kaz & understand your meaning, surely a public forum isn't the place to air your views, thoughts, wishes & to ask advice if you think it has nothing to do with the people you are communicating with - even asking someones opinions is inviting them to have 'something' to do with the subject   

[SkyeandOllie]

I did wonder what was happening and if Im honest thought something was amiss.  Sorry it didnt work out,  I was also in the camp of waiting till Diesel was older, but as you say hindsight is a great thing. You've obviously learnt alot from this, Diesel may come round with walks, I'd keep them out of eachothers houses,  walks together only,  walking together forms a bond,  Something Im working on with Ollie and my mums boy Dougal who at the moment has hit sexual maturity and is posturing and wanting to fight with Ollie (who thankfully hasn't reacted). They will be walked together but not venturing into eachothers houses.

Some pictures of Riley please!!! 

[Max X 2]

Sorry it didn't work out with Diesel & Riley, it sounds like your OH has taken it quite bad

Hopefully in time as they both mature & maybe on neutral territory they'll grow to like each other, at least you & your OH can still see Riley

[wendyt]

Charlene I'm so sorry to hear that Diesel and Riley didn't get along together, it must have been heartbreaking for you but under these circumstances you made the right decision. Be happy that Riley has gone to a wondeful home where you can visit and see him grow and hopefully in time Diesel will be more able to accept him.

Sending   to you all.

[Cockertime Blues]

Hi Charlene, I'm sorry you've all had such a distressing time but it sounds like all's well that ends well to me.  I've not read about the controversy but they may have got on or not got on, and you'd no way of knowing until you tried it.  It sounds like you've resolved the problem very successfully and can still see Riley.  To keep him would not have been right.

My only question (not to you but to all COLers) is that it sounds like Riley and Diesel didn't get on from the word go.  When you buy a puppy, do you not do a meet and greet first between the pup and the dog you already have and have them spend a bit of time together?  Before purchase? Or is that not the done thing when a breeder is involved?  Or was it just not apparent till they'd been at home a while?