Help & advice urgently needed please.

[BeeBoo]

A lovely lady posted these elsewhere....

http://www.scallywagsdogs.com/ScallywagsDogs/Images2013/toilet%20training1.pdf
http://www.scallywagsdogs.com/ScallywagsDogs/Images2013/puppy%20biting1.pdf 

[Redked]

Eva-Rose, it was only a few weeks ago that I felt the same. Bonnie is 20 weeks now but from 8 wks to 15 wks I was in tears most days wishing I'd never had her. Cockers should come under a different category of species as they are nothing like other dogs! I would have given her away if someone had promised to take care of her (ask Maddy74)  . I've never felt so stressed, upset and utterly distraught with any situation. I don't think I hated her but I certainly did not love her and just wanted rid.

I cannot believe that only a few weeks later I love my little lady more than I thought was possible. Please persevere, listen to the advice of the experienced members on here and you will reach a turning point. When you do you will be so glad as the Cocker is one hell of a beautiful, loving, funny, joyful family member. Good luck and remember that most of us have been where you are and have now reached the light at the end of the tunnel. You will be there quicker than you think xx

[maddy74]

I am so sorry to read about losing your lovely Moby.  and so young too 

Eva-Rose, it was only a few weeks ago that I felt the same. Bonnie is 20 weeks now but from 8 wks to 15 wks I was in tears most days wishing I'd never had her. Cockers should come under a different category of species as they are nothing like other dogs! I would have given her away if someone had promised to take care of her (ask Maddy74)  . I've never felt so stressed, upset and utterly distraught with any situation. I don't think I hated her but I certainly did not love her and just wanted rid.

I cannot believe that only a few weeks later I love my little lady more than I thought was possible. Please persevere, listen to the advice of the experienced members on here and you will reach a turning point. When you do you will be so glad as the Cocker is one hell of a beautiful, loving, funny, joyful family member. Good luck and remember that most of us have been where you are and have now reached the light at the end of the tunnel. You will be there quicker than you think xx

Yep I agree Redked  

Ive been in the same boat as others on here, Willow was a nightmare as a pup and i cried so much in the early stages. I remember one day her weeing in the house about 12 times it was dreadful. She was also a nightmare in her crate when we left her. Things were very hard in the early days but please stick with it. There will soon be light at the end of the tunnel.  

Keep posting on here and others will help you through it,if it wasnt for col we would have probably sent Willow back for sure. Some days were hell on earth but she has tuned out to be such a fab loving little dog and she is the apple of our eye. 

[Archie bean]

So sorry to read what a tough time you are having. Like so many others have said, we have all been there and know that you need loads of these.   
I was in a very similar position to you with my boy Archie. After my first cocker died I couldn't face not having another. I got my second pup Dickon, the same week. He was adorable, easy going and just generally a joy. 11 years later, when I lost him too I had no doubts about doing the same thing again. Boy did I get a shock. Archie was a complete nightmare from day one. EVERYTHING was different. If you read some of my earliest posts you will see how I too just felt that I couldn't bond with him. I felt I had made such a mistake and felt rubbish for feeling that way. I have since learned that some pups are just much harder than others - and a difficult cocker is about as difficult as it gets!
The first, and hardest thing for me was to stop comparing Archie to Dickon and stop trying to recreate what I had lost. Archie is a totally different character. He is complex and challenging but learning to handle his issues has proved to be one of the most satisfying things I have ever done. He is the most loving, loyal dog that I have ever owned. Much of our progress together has come from the support and advice I have recieved here, so you have come to the right place.

So, the spaniel bowls will definately help with the ears.
Remember, you are sleep deprived so every little problem is being magnified.
You mention that you are getiting up two or three times a night and that still isn't enough? It may be worth checking what you are feeding her. Some foods produce more output than others.  Also what time is her last meal before bedtime?
I admit, I have never been comfortable with crates. I have always provided paper near the pups bed and they have always just used that overnight. Archie sleeps with me and actually never did poos overnight. One, last thing at about 11pm and then up at 6.30 which got gradually later as he got older. He did one, possibly two wees overnight on the paper. It all depends on how comfortable you are with cleaning up in the morning. Dickon, who slept in the kitchen, didn't trample in his mess, he just got straight back into bed. My personal feeling is that I don't want to train my pup to think that I get up for them overnight. I also found them easier to deal with in the day if I had had some sleep. Crates do work well for many people though so maybe reducing the size will help. The other alternative is to have a bed area at one end and paper at the other. I know this isn't how crates are meant to work though!
Make a deal with yourself to make a new start and to not be hard on yourself if you find you are struggling. Do little training sessions. Lots of praise and treats if she will sit etc. if she sees that she is pleasing she will be happy which will help you feel happy. Play some fetch with a toy. Even if it is just for a few minutes at a time it will help build up that bond between you. Remember that they pick up on your feelings so a bit of mutual silly fun with fluffy thing or a ball will benefit you both.
Good luck. 

[fiona2]

How are things this morning Eva Rose?

[lettie10]

I have 2 show cockers now aged 1 and almost 2, both from 8 wks old.  I am feeling your pain and can't really offer any other advice as it has all been said and is good advice so just echo all the previous posts.

Just wanted to say that I have a puppy pen which I am no longer using and will happily send it to you if you want to message me your address.  My second pup used it for sleeping and time outs (to separate her from my older cocker) before progressing into a crate as she got bigger.  I now don't use either as they are great together.

This is Bailey in the pen when I first brought her home (it also has the mesh cover)

It is yours if you want it

Collette

[BeeBoo]

^ so kind 

[Eva-Rose]

You are all SO lovely, you've just made me cry again (but in a good way this time!)

Right, let me update you all.....

So yesterday morning I woke up to possibly the most stinky, wet, messy horrid crate ever! I swear she poo's more than an elephant! So I bathed her (again!) and then wrapped her in a towel and she fell asleep on me for about 3 hours.  It suddenly struck me that maybe she is tired too.  So we had a very quiet day, after her snooze I put her straight out for a wee which she did! Then she ate some food and came running in to me again for more cuddles.  This is the most time we have spent together so that in itself is a break through. 

I took her in to the garden for a game of fetch (not that she brings anything back lol!) I don't know if she can hear properly or if she's just a bit ignorant, because even when I call her loudly or make a really high pitched noise or squeak her toy she doesn't seem to notice at all, but she seemed to enjoy being outside with me, so that was nice.

I went to my slimming club last night so she was left in the care of my hubby and kids - who didn't bother watching her, so she wee'd indoors twice (I was soooo bloody cross with them!! Lazy monkeys!!)    but apart from that she was quite good.

I put her to bed last night with a folded blanket at one end of the crate and a pee pad at the other end.  I went to bed at midnight and didn't bother getting up at all in the night!!  I went down at 7 this morning to find one wee on the puppy pad (which she had tried to cover up with her blanket - so I guess she knows it is wrong if that makes sense!)

This morning I feel fresher, better and a lot more calm than before.  It's still hard and I feel guilty for even having her in Moby's home, but she isn't going anywhere! I will see this through and eventually I hope I will find the friendship and love that I shared with Moby.  I know it will be different - but maybe that's the way it has to be, so that I can move on and let Moby go properly.. God..... Lump in the throat again lol! 

Can I ask you all what food you would recommend?  At the mo I am trying to wean her off of the food the breeder raised her on.  Honestly it's soooo gross!  It's raw tripe mince mixed with a tinned food.  The smell is awful!!  I always fed Moby on Royal Canin which I am slowly introducing to Lily now mixed in with the other nasty stuff.  Can't wait to get rid of the tripe lol!!  Also, she is being fed 3 times a day and I try to not feed her after 6pm.  Does that sound okay to you all?  Any help is so greatfully received 


Colette, thank you so very much for the offer of the play pen! How much would you like for it - and I wonder how much postage would be?  What area do you live in?  Possibly I could collect?  You really are so very kind xx

[8 Hairy Feet]

Ah ... a tip to test the hearing...
the crinkling of a biscuit packet
in the next room generally brings
the hairy feet a-running to see
what's on offer
steffxxx

[black taz]

So pleased things are sounding better.  If Taz is anything to go by, it does get better.  Taz wasnt too bad overnight - apart from the first couple of nights when he slept in the playpen fully extended, not only had he wee'd and poo'd but had managed to move the play pen around the kitched spreading the mess with him.  From the 2nd night onwards we folded the playpen down to about half the size, and he was pretty good then, doing his mess on the paper (we had also wedged the playpen so it couldnt move).

His daytime housetraining seemed to take forever though. 

Stick with it, you wont be sorry

[MIN]

Hi Ya  Eva-Rose

Cant help with the puppy issues as it is such along time since we had a dog from scratch
.What i want to say is. My first dog theakston was a nightmare from day one. mess, damage, noise, we had the lot. Even came home one day and my OH I believe was about to kill him . Anyway we had him for 10 years (and the mess, damage etc but it did a bit better),despite that he became my shadow, soul mate if you like and i still miss him now 16 years later ( tears now at the thought of him). We since have had a further 3 dogs ( love them all)
Believe me when i say, if I could i would have my beloveded theakston and his issues back tomorrow ,but not if it meant i had to sacrifice my others.

[PennyB]

It will take time - and unfortunately once you get one thing sorted another thing will happen to test your resolve and patience.

It does get easier but you need to remember she is still a pup who needs to learn

Also cockers can be messy little things anyway once you get out and about walking with her - its the nature of them to want to wallow in mud or roll in dead things - they may look pretty but they're working dogs at heart

Enjoy the good things and take a deep breath

[fiona2]

its wonderful what a decent kip can do! glad you have had a more positive day

[Eva-Rose]

Just taken a photo of the little minx, so I will post it as soon as I find the right message board to put it on! 

[Eva-Rose]

Actually....... how on earth do you post photos?!!!!! 

I am a complete tech-idiot lol xx